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 The Equaliser

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the deeb
Auld Slapper
Auld Slapper
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Managing : to get in the way

Posts : 903
Career Goals : 14666
Location : my front room

20100908
PostThe Equaliser



Meet Noah Lahm.


He’s a hired gun. Chairmen employ him to sort out the mess. No challenge is too tough, no situation too hopeless.

He takes no prisoners. He don’t stand for no nonsense.

Fancydans, you better make sure your dans are very fancy, as anyone not pulling their weight will be dealt with.

He has ways of dealing with shirkers.

He ain’t got time for contract renewals. He don’t give a damn about what the press think. He’s only interested in results.

He signs for the highest bidder. He flies in, sorts out the mess, then flies back out again. Looking for the next unwinnable challenge.

He thrives on pressure. He lives for relegation battles. Play-off pushes are his bag.

Wherever there’s a relegation battle – he’ll bring survival.
Where there’s a promotion push – he’ll bring success.
Any club that has never won anything – he’ll deliver the goods.

He is available to every major league, but the task better be tough. He’s not interested in big money jobs, loads of transfer funds. He wants it tough,almost beyond hope. But he’s not interested in working for a whole season. He ain’t interested in careers.

Oh no. This man just lives for the moment.

Noah Lahm is
The Equaliser



Watchout. He’ll be coming to a club near you





2012 European Championship Winners
2012 Olympic Games Gold Medallists


Last edited by the deeb on 2010-09-08, 22:39; edited 1 time in total
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The Equaliser :: Comments

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Re: The Equaliser
Post on 2010-10-12, 13:58 by the deeb

I’ve had a pukker week, plenty of drink, plenty of jack.

I just abaht manage to drag meself to our grand where we meet Nurnberg.

Bit of a nuffin game, really. Already confirmed our survival and I’ve chalked another one off on my way to a fortune.

No one can touch me.

Had to make a change to the line-up due to an injury. It finally hits me that we’ve not had too many of these here. Must be summink to do wiv the mid-season break, cos if this was England, there’d be players in and outta the treatment room.

I ain’t been here long enough to feel I’m gonna miss the place. They’ve been decent to me, to be fair.

The first ‘arf went by in a blur. Fans are cheering, and they ain’t done much-a that this season, I can tell yer. No goals in the first ‘arf, until 3 mins from the break when Nurnberg score. Bit lucky, but the players seem determined to get back level.

Early in the 2nd ‘arf we draw level. An own goal does it, but almost immediately Barrios makes it 2-1 to us.

I throw some subs on and we’re in control and I find meself liking this lot.

They’ve done what I asked, in the way I asked.

2 minutes from the end and Grosskreutz completes a 3-1 win and its party time.

Game ends and the fans wanna see me on the pitch. I ain’t really interested, but these ‘ave been patient people and ‘ave been behind me, so I concede.

Quite like the attention, to be honest, but I need to be careful not to get too ‘nancy-boy’ abaht it all.

I’m off to greater things.

No idea who will be up next, but F.U. mentioned Russia or Sweden, so it’ll be summink different.

For now, I spend a bit-a time looking at the league table, and we stayed up by just 4pts, but the fing that stands aht is that Dortmund could-a finished 6th wiv anuvver 9pts. But that’s how it is.

Time for me to catch me fight ahter ‘ere and find aht where I am next.



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Re: The Equaliser
Post on 2010-10-12, 17:27 by Pringers
Excellent result, and good ending. I wonder where your going now Smile

Keep it up!
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Re: The Equaliser
Post on 2010-12-02, 00:26 by Narl
Haha, Deebster, this is absolutely brilliant Very Happy


Your style of writing, I have to say, is quite hilarious, and it makes the article so easy to read!

I've enjoyed reading this, and I'm looking forward to more now!

Well done on keeping up Dortmund as well, "The Equalizer"
Re: The Equaliser
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